I’ve been aware of the need to go to they gym and eating healthy to be ‘healthy’, well cause it’s promoted so much on the media. but what i missed out on was mental health regarding the realm of ‘health’. my sleep patterns would be affected by my poor management of stress where there would be periods of time i kept sleeping and feeling tired (before, during, after class) – basically any time of the day. and there would periods of time where i just couldnt sleep at all and had to keep forcing myself to. i would lie on my bed till 3-3.30am in the dark just tossing and turning around.
However, what was affected more was my eating habits. I had gained a LOT of weight since my stay in Kuching. Some people would say it’s because I’m maturing physically with more curves and such. However, i hated it. a lot. i’ve always like the small, skinny physique so I didn’t want to be curvy. what i’d also realize was the amount of unhealthy food i would suddenly eat when study-stressed, bored or after a test or exam. Woo it was just bad.
One more thing I found out was the amount of exercise I really wasn’t doing. I thought the constant walking back and forth from my condo to the school was already being sort-of active because in Sarawak, i never had to walk like that anyway. I was so wrong.
This brings in the professional help I got, which I mentioned in my previous post, towards the end of the year when i really realized that something was wrong and I needed to get my life together. The psychiatrist brought up light (sunlight), exercise or simply watching people exercising and the main issue of dealing with homesickness. i thought i knew what homesickness was because i experienced it v unpleasantly during one holiday without my family but this homesickness was different with a more long lasting duration thing that revolves around your life constantly.
Fast forward to the current situation: so so much better, with tons more exercise and looking less bloated, lost some weight i think? (maybe not on the scale but physically when i see myself in the mirror, it’s better!), and not feeling so homesick anymore!!! I’m still dealing with stress and my eating habits especially. Sleeping schedule’s a icky thing to work on too esp since i’m a mixture between a lion and wolf (the four different types of sleep animals are dolphins, bears, lions and wolves – check it out, it’s freakin cool). I love waking up early and rockin on from the morning and automatically feeling damn tired by 11pm, but sometimes i just continue on with the day till 3am and still feeling fine and productive.
To end this post, i just wanna say how the first 14-15 months of college has really expanded my knowledge of health, exercise and fitness. I love health and always feel like shit if i’ve not been in the gym for 2 weeks which happens sometimes. but its a process and i want to embrace everything im going through. my priorities are in check this year and i love love it! ❤
p.s. aksljfhawe i. cant. decide. on. which. school. to. go. to. i got accepted into all the schools i applied, including University of Illinois, University of Minnesota – Twin Cities, University of Michigan – Ann Arbor (and University of Iowa as my backup). My top choice (and the one I was suuuper anxious about was Umich but now since I got accepted into all of them which I didnt think i would, I’m deciding between Minn and Mich. Fingers crossed that whatever school I pick works out well. urgh! hhahaha